Pilot Season 2018, Part 2

13 02 2018

If you haven’t read Part One be sure to do so, as you will need to reference it.

Jan 29, 12pm

I get a call from my agent. He has an audition for me for a great CABLE show. Let’s call this one MONKEY BARS. Character is dark and sad. I mishear what my agent says on the phone (I am hard of hearing), and THINK I hear that the audition is due at 3pm TODAY. As in THREE HOURS FROM NOW. This is not unusual in my previous experience, so I kind of flip out and jump into working. This means I have to schedule someone to pick up my two kids from school, so I can tape when I would have been traveling 1.5 hours round trip to get both of them, and so I can focus with what little time I have.


Frantic call to best friend and fellow actor Nick Thompson to see if he can drop everything and come tape me. He can. Thank GOD for him.



I start my process, knowing it will be a bit truncated. Focus first on accent! This is a REGIONAL accent I am unfamiliar with, and it crucial to the story. David Alan Stern and learnaccent.com/ to the rescue again. I also YOUTUBE some people from the region and listen to them for a bit.

I go to work on the script, they didn’t give me the whole script this time, so I am really using that Tim Phillips method of “SHERLOCK HOLMES-ING the text” to glean all the clues I can from this one. So many questions I need answered to even begin to act this one authentically, including the names of several other characters and things that they are doing/have happened to them – and NO REFERENCE MATERIAL for who they are or what happened.

I do my best to memorize, but it is six pages of THICK dialogue. Whew.


Nick shows up and we start taping. I am rusty on this one due to a lack of time, and it feels horrible. I warm up eventually, and we start getting great stuff.

2:15pm (you read that correctly)

I start loading the audition into my computer, and as I move the takes into the editing bar I realize… even though the camera was showing that it was taping, it was cutting off one minute and 30 seconds into EVERY SINGLE TAKE. The scene? It’s nearly FIVE MINUTES LONG. Something is up with my camera. SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT. I have 45 minutes to get this fucker in.

It was not Nick’s fault, let me be clear, the camera was running, but somehow it is not transferring into the memory card. FUCK ME. Now we have to retape.


I write a panicked email to my agent about the camera glitches and tell him I am retaping. We strap my iPhone to the tripod and dive in. We tape the second half of the scene, and I will have to be ok with cutting them together – there isn’t enough time to retape the whole thing, import to the computer, edit, and export and send. A five minute audition tape takes FOREVER to export and send.


I upload the iPhone footage into my computer – after cursing and figuring out the AirDrop thing – and as I do so, I notice an email from my agent. “Why are you rushing this? It isn’t due till TOMORROW at 3pm.” Oh man…………

I am partially relieved and partially super-annoyed at myself because I didn’t read the audition notice carefully, as I thought I had limited time. Never going to make THAT mistake again. Well… I have more time, so now I am going to USE IT. I ask Nick if he can come back tomorrow morning so we can try this again – with the iPhone – because I don’t trust my camera now (even though I reformatted the memory card, the internal memory – everything), luckily Nick CAN come back.


I take advantage of the kids being with family to work work work in my usual methods. See the previous post. I know when they get home it will be homework, dinner, baths and bed, so I need to use these extra two hours for all they are worth.


One kid is in bed, and the quieter one is awake – but he understands when I say I have to work – so I buckle down and work some more before heading to bed.

January 30, 9am

The kids are off to school, Nick comes over, and we tape. This time, it is so much better. I have had the time to put into it, and I don’t feel like a complete hack. Plus, in the extra time I figured out a really important detail about another character… something I was playing completely incorrectly. DAMN am I glad I misheard my agent.

I edit the tape and send it in. Again, into the ether…

Here is a glimpse into the audition tape for MONKEY BARS.



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